A Child’s Love

a-childs-first-love-45Can someone tell me how do you know if you love someone? Can someone tell me what is love? I don’t know if I love him romantically, but just know that I care for him very, very much and have shed many, many tears for him. Despite all his flaws, his childishness, his immaturity, his naïve cruelty, I still care for him and even after moments of hating for what he did to me I could not continue to hold the resentment and melt down to weeping and silly smiles when I remember his warmth and kindness. Is this love or am I just a child?

I know he has a messy past and hard upbringing, and I honestly loath how he keeps using them as an excuse but only because I feel he does not see the fact that he does not have to be tied down to them. We’ve all been broken in some way, and it’s not fair to keep using that as an excuse for our current behavior. I just want to be a child before him and admire and love him in the most innocent, purest way I know.

I want to see him become a mature adult, and to be responsible and finally be able to confront his demons. I want to be there to support him, to be by his side, always, in heart and spirit when my body could not provide. Even when the day gets dark and even if he lashes out his temper at me, I will not falter. Is this love or am I just a child with a foolish infatuation?