Confusion & Hurt: A Conversation Open

hurtI cannot understand, so I posed a question to friends recently. Here are their replies:

Momoka: “I’m wondering if people can tell me how can anyone live with themselves after doing others terribly wrong and know it. How can people still be happy and carry on with their lives knowing they sacrificed others to get it? I don’t understand how can people have so little regard for another human being… Happiness at the cost of others is no true happiness I believe… Little me is sooooo confused and disheartened by seeing all the awful things people do to each other…”

A kind doctor: “People do mean things and blow it off for there own happiness at the cost of others. You are such a loyal considerate woman – big huggles to you right now.”

A patient gentleman: “Hello [name]… Thank you for an amazingly human post….

People, struggling in ‘Denial of their human-beingness and Isolation from the outside world’, or ‘distancers’, there are other misleading clinical diagnoses, but they don’t help.. It’s a neurological phenomenon…. Gain a sense of relief from their ‘pain of separation’, by trying to control the world around them, including the people… They feel the world is hurting them so must be controlled… They have tricked themselves into believing that by breaking others, and making them like themselves, broken, they then have become ‘fixed’… Because they have the power…

They aren’t happy, that’s the truth… They feel ‘compensated’ for their pain, by the ‘thrill’ or ‘pleasure’ of the actions they take…

I have learned to be compassionate to their plight, as it’s not their fault; however, I’m seeking ways to help them by my actions and my way of being…. Because, in the end we are then helping ourselves…

Here are two gifts, [name], that I have shared here a couple of times… But, feel they may inspire you, too…

“There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own souls. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” ~ Carl Gustav Jung

‎”All violence is the result of people tricking themselves into believing that their pain derives from other people and that consequently those people deserve to be punished.” ~ Marshall Rosenberg

Hope you are having a gorgeous day….”

People hurt. Sometimes they do not know what they are doing, sometimes they commit the deeds with full intentions. I honestly do not, and will probably never, understand how can people still carry on after doing great wrongs to others. I must also admit it has been tremendously difficult to forgive, pray and even come to love those who have done awful acts to me, and I sometimes feel like a hypocrite for feeling bitter, but I am working on self-healing so that I do not pass on the hurt and pain to others. Despite of all the evil done to me, I am proud of myself for never taking the road of retribution, never becoming ugly, and never uttering even an ill word, otherwise I would just perpetuate the vicious cycle. I chose to let the poison end with me.

But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. Matthew 5:44

I guess I will just continue loving you 🙂